Wednesday, April 9, 2014
Wednesday, April 2, 2014
Thursday, March 27, 2014
Finding Sweetness in the Fussiness
Afternoon fussiness is back with a vengeance in our home. In the mornings, my sweet little Doodlebug wakes up smiling, giggling and excited to be awake. By afternoon, he is a fussy, nothing-will-console-me-but-keeping-trying-mama crazy man! Kid, you're supposed to feel refreshed after a 2 hour nap!
The other day we were cuddling in Mama and Dada's "big bed" post mid-day nap. Doodlebug's big eyes were staring right into mine. After 20 minutes, I thought we should get up. The conversation went like this:
Mama: Should we go downstairs and get a snack? Something to eat?
Doodlebug: No, no eat.
Mama: We can get an apple.
Doodlebug: No, no apple.
Mama: We can watch a Daniel Tiger.
Doodlebug: No, no Tiger.
Mama: We could play with our blocks.
Doodlebug: No, no play.
By this point, I'm losing my gentle mommy patience. I'm thinking about the dinner that needs prepping and laundry needs to go into the dryer.
Mama: Well, baby what DO you want?
Doodlebug: MAMAAA!
Heart MELT! You can bet we stayed in bed cuddling for another 20 minutes.
The other day we were cuddling in Mama and Dada's "big bed" post mid-day nap. Doodlebug's big eyes were staring right into mine. After 20 minutes, I thought we should get up. The conversation went like this:
Mama: Should we go downstairs and get a snack? Something to eat?
Doodlebug: No, no eat.
Mama: We can get an apple.
Doodlebug: No, no apple.
Mama: We can watch a Daniel Tiger.
Doodlebug: No, no Tiger.
Mama: We could play with our blocks.
Doodlebug: No, no play.
By this point, I'm losing my gentle mommy patience. I'm thinking about the dinner that needs prepping and laundry needs to go into the dryer.
Mama: Well, baby what DO you want?
Doodlebug: MAMAAA!
Heart MELT! You can bet we stayed in bed cuddling for another 20 minutes.
Wednesday, March 26, 2014
Wednesday, March 12, 2014
Friday, March 7, 2014
Going Out with a Bang at Speech Therapy
Well yesterday was a rough day for Doodlebug and me. We had our last
speech therapy session (that insurance would cover) and I was hoping to
end on a high note since the last session went so well.
But that is not what happened. At all.
Doodlebug never really "took to" this therapist in the three sessions that we've had with her. She's very knowledgable and I respect her observations on Doodlebug's language development. But she has been kind of rigid in her therapy with him - insisting for 15-20 minutes that he play with one specific toy even when he has shown no interest in it, telling me not to look at him or comfort him unless he is interacting with us productively, or with the toy with which she's trying to encourage play, etc.
The therapist kept commenting on how long he was continuing to be upset. She has noted in the past that no other children have taken this long to warm up to her, spoken with an air of judgement, like there's something wrong with my kid because he doesn't like her. Sometimes kids have off days, we all do (I'm so tired of making excuses and reading into any behavior of my toddler that is not perfectly behaved. Sigh.). Doodlebug wasn't into it that day. He wanted mama and my ignoring him only made it worse. One touch or stroke of his head and he would have calmed down in seconds.
I get that he needs to learn self-soothing strategies for himself, but SERIOUSLY, he's two years old and we were in a barely familiar place with someone he didn't trust. I don't think his behavior was that odd. And I'm SO MAD at myself for listening to the therapist, ignoring my kid for 30 minutes and putting him through such an upsetting ordeal. She may be a speech expert, but I am an expert on my kid.
But that is not what happened. At all.
Doodlebug never really "took to" this therapist in the three sessions that we've had with her. She's very knowledgable and I respect her observations on Doodlebug's language development. But she has been kind of rigid in her therapy with him - insisting for 15-20 minutes that he play with one specific toy even when he has shown no interest in it, telling me not to look at him or comfort him unless he is interacting with us productively, or with the toy with which she's trying to encourage play, etc.
The therapist kept commenting on how long he was continuing to be upset. She has noted in the past that no other children have taken this long to warm up to her, spoken with an air of judgement, like there's something wrong with my kid because he doesn't like her. Sometimes kids have off days, we all do (I'm so tired of making excuses and reading into any behavior of my toddler that is not perfectly behaved. Sigh.). Doodlebug wasn't into it that day. He wanted mama and my ignoring him only made it worse. One touch or stroke of his head and he would have calmed down in seconds.
I get that he needs to learn self-soothing strategies for himself, but SERIOUSLY, he's two years old and we were in a barely familiar place with someone he didn't trust. I don't think his behavior was that odd. And I'm SO MAD at myself for listening to the therapist, ignoring my kid for 30 minutes and putting him through such an upsetting ordeal. She may be a speech expert, but I am an expert on my kid.
Wednesday, March 5, 2014
Tuesday, February 25, 2014
My Toddler has a Speech Delay and What Else...?
So the verdict is in. Based on the evaluation a few weeks ago, the Speech Pathologist has reported that Doodlebug has a "moderate delay" in expressive communication. This was difficult to hear, but also somewhat of a relief to me since knowing will help us better help him.
The Good News
Doodlebug would likely catch up and communicate verbally at a level appropriate for his age with therapy sessions and some strategies we can use to communicate with him at home. The therapist is very confident that his ability to achieve that goal is excellent with a few months of therapy. We've had two sessions so far and I can already see a difference. Doodlebug has started saying some two word phrases like "cat eat" "more orange" and "more car car". He has also started noticing verbs (other than eat and read") like "cook" and "play".
The I-don't-know-what-to-do-with-this-yet News
Unfortunately, there was more to the report. First the evaluator mentions that there were some common autism characteristics that she observed - only answering to his name 75% of the time, preference to play alone and his high interest in letters, numbers and colors at his age. Now, I should mention that we ASKED her if she had any concerns about autism after the evaluation, so it's possible that's why she noted it in the report. But seeing any mentioned of autism related to your child is scary! I had noticed those traits in Doodlebug a while ago, but we had always dismissed any concerns by thinking those were normal traits for a two-year-old boy. But maybe not?
And the double whammy was the recommendation that we have Doodlebug evaluated for a Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). Ugh. I kind of had a feeling that this one was coming... but again - I had convinced myself that some traits I had noticed were normal for a two-year-old (or at least normal for Doodlebug), like his fussiness at his 2nd birthday party or his very long warming up period for strangers. Large crowds and unexpected changes have always overwhelmed our sensitive little guy. I never wanted to make a big deal about that though. My feeling is that I'm not going to force my kids to socialize or to act like other kids. It's great that some kids like to play with other children, hold hands with them and sing and dance with them. My child does not. It's nice if your child will go with the flow around a new adult, babysitter, etc. Mine will not. He struggles with new people, he wants familiarity and he especially does not like grumpy adults. If you're disingenuous or in a bad mood, my child sense it and stay far away from you. If he were an adult, we would considered him to be a good judge of character! But now I'm being told that it's a concern. We haven't done the SPD evaluation yet, so I guess we'll see...
I'm feeling so many mixed emotions going into these evaluations/ therapies - hopeful, scared, anxious, but mostly overwhelmed right now. I'm due with our second baby in 10 weeks and I'm worried about giving Doodlebug the extra attention he needs right now while trying to prepare for Baby Girl's arrival. I better start improving my juggling routine.
The Good News
Doodlebug would likely catch up and communicate verbally at a level appropriate for his age with therapy sessions and some strategies we can use to communicate with him at home. The therapist is very confident that his ability to achieve that goal is excellent with a few months of therapy. We've had two sessions so far and I can already see a difference. Doodlebug has started saying some two word phrases like "cat eat" "more orange" and "more car car". He has also started noticing verbs (other than eat and read") like "cook" and "play".
 |
| Doodlebug and his "unusual interest in letters" |
The I-don't-know-what-to-do-with-this-yet News
Unfortunately, there was more to the report. First the evaluator mentions that there were some common autism characteristics that she observed - only answering to his name 75% of the time, preference to play alone and his high interest in letters, numbers and colors at his age. Now, I should mention that we ASKED her if she had any concerns about autism after the evaluation, so it's possible that's why she noted it in the report. But seeing any mentioned of autism related to your child is scary! I had noticed those traits in Doodlebug a while ago, but we had always dismissed any concerns by thinking those were normal traits for a two-year-old boy. But maybe not?
And the double whammy was the recommendation that we have Doodlebug evaluated for a Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD). Ugh. I kind of had a feeling that this one was coming... but again - I had convinced myself that some traits I had noticed were normal for a two-year-old (or at least normal for Doodlebug), like his fussiness at his 2nd birthday party or his very long warming up period for strangers. Large crowds and unexpected changes have always overwhelmed our sensitive little guy. I never wanted to make a big deal about that though. My feeling is that I'm not going to force my kids to socialize or to act like other kids. It's great that some kids like to play with other children, hold hands with them and sing and dance with them. My child does not. It's nice if your child will go with the flow around a new adult, babysitter, etc. Mine will not. He struggles with new people, he wants familiarity and he especially does not like grumpy adults. If you're disingenuous or in a bad mood, my child sense it and stay far away from you. If he were an adult, we would considered him to be a good judge of character! But now I'm being told that it's a concern. We haven't done the SPD evaluation yet, so I guess we'll see...
I'm feeling so many mixed emotions going into these evaluations/ therapies - hopeful, scared, anxious, but mostly overwhelmed right now. I'm due with our second baby in 10 weeks and I'm worried about giving Doodlebug the extra attention he needs right now while trying to prepare for Baby Girl's arrival. I better start improving my juggling routine.
Friday, February 14, 2014
Homemade Valentines
Happy Valentine's Day, lovely people of the internet!
However you feel about Hallmark holidays, it's difficult to grumble about a day of sweetness and love. I tell my loved ones that I love and appreciate them very often. So Valentine's Day just feels like a day to show that love x 10!
This is the first Valentine's that I tried to do a craft activity with Doodlebug. He still doesn't really "get" these holidays, but since we had to bring in valentines for a party at preschool, I thought we could have some art time together and make them. I found this crayon valentine tutorial from Chef Messy and thought we would give it a try. I knew Doodlebug wouldn't really partake in most of the crayon making process, but I was okay with that.
Next it was time to put the valentines together. I wanted Doodlebug to add his personal touch to his valentines, so I gave him crayons and paper to scribble on. He usually loves any art activity, so I wasn't prepared for his complete disinterest in scribbling. I think giving him small crayons to scribble with is where I went wrong. He's used to the chunkier, easy-to-hold crayons and markers. The thin crayons got a major "thumbs down" from Doodlebug and he ended up sorting them into piles and then throwing them across the table. Lesson learned! I managed to get just enough scribbles from Doodlebug to use on the valentines.
And later today, I will continue the love festivities and make this Chocolate Eclair Cake for Dr. Spacetime. Maybe I will handle Doodlebug's bath and bedtime too, so that my love can ALSO get some time on the treadmill. Kisses, cake and a jog - the perfect Valentine's package?
However you feel about Hallmark holidays, it's difficult to grumble about a day of sweetness and love. I tell my loved ones that I love and appreciate them very often. So Valentine's Day just feels like a day to show that love x 10!
This is the first Valentine's that I tried to do a craft activity with Doodlebug. He still doesn't really "get" these holidays, but since we had to bring in valentines for a party at preschool, I thought we could have some art time together and make them. I found this crayon valentine tutorial from Chef Messy and thought we would give it a try. I knew Doodlebug wouldn't really partake in most of the crayon making process, but I was okay with that.
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| Peeling paper off the crayons was the most time consuming of the process. |
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| I was careful to use lots of light-colored crayons so the melted versions didn't get muddied. |
 |
| A team effort from mama and Doodlebug. |
Wednesday, February 5, 2014
Speech Delay or Normal Distracted Two Year Old?
My first hint that Doodlebug might be falling behind developmentally was months ago when he was still going to full-time day care. At pick-up one day, I knelt down to say hello to one of his friends (another little boy who is only one month older than Doodlebug). "Where's Doodlebug?" I asked the little boy, expecting him to point or say "there". Instead, he replied, "He's right over there." A perfectly comprehensive 4 words sentence that I couldn't imagine Doodlebug saying even months from now or even understanding.
Over the next few months, I've tried not to worry, but instead to celebrate Doodlebug for who he is with all his quirkiness. I thought staying home and having more one-on-one time with me would help him develop speech better. So even though we had some concerns at his two year Well Child appointment, we wanted to give him more time to develop. I've always heard other parents say that their child just started talking one day or that their child changed so much in just one month. So I guess I was crossing my fingers and hoping that's what would happen for Doodlebug.
November came and went and then December and the holidays, too. It seemed like Doodlebug's speech hadn't advanced at all. He has learned new some new words. My little guy knows all the letters of the alphabet, all the colors of the rainbow, numbers from 1 to 13 and even many shapes. But don't ask him to tell you what he's doing, ask for what he wants or talk about a book in even a two-word phrase. Because he won't. Even when we try to encourage him to say "want strawberries" he replies either "want" or "strawberries", or when we comment that he's "dancing to music" he replies "dance" or "music". Never both words. He has not seemed to grasp the idea of verbs, his speech has just not advanced to that point yet.
Maybe this is normal. I don't know. I do know that I watch other kids his age and most of them speak in sentences and listen and respond when spoken too. My kid doesn't hear you and is running off to sort the colored blocks on the other side of the room as you ask him a question. He may call out the colors of the blocks as he sorts or stacks them, but he doesn't want to talk to you about them. So please, don't ask. I know this distraction is likely normal for his age, but I feel that the lack of speech is not.
Tomorrow we will have the first of numerous evaluations. I'm terrified about what we might discover. Maybe Doodlebug is totally normal and I'm expecting too much, or maybe he does have a developmental delay or disorder. Either way, I'm looking forward to getting some answers and perspective from experts.
No matter what happens, I know he will still be my lovable little man with his squinty-eyed smile and his sweet kisses. NOTHING can ever change that. But I have to admit, I am feeling nervous and holding my breath tonight.
Over the next few months, I've tried not to worry, but instead to celebrate Doodlebug for who he is with all his quirkiness. I thought staying home and having more one-on-one time with me would help him develop speech better. So even though we had some concerns at his two year Well Child appointment, we wanted to give him more time to develop. I've always heard other parents say that their child just started talking one day or that their child changed so much in just one month. So I guess I was crossing my fingers and hoping that's what would happen for Doodlebug.
November came and went and then December and the holidays, too. It seemed like Doodlebug's speech hadn't advanced at all. He has learned new some new words. My little guy knows all the letters of the alphabet, all the colors of the rainbow, numbers from 1 to 13 and even many shapes. But don't ask him to tell you what he's doing, ask for what he wants or talk about a book in even a two-word phrase. Because he won't. Even when we try to encourage him to say "want strawberries" he replies either "want" or "strawberries", or when we comment that he's "dancing to music" he replies "dance" or "music". Never both words. He has not seemed to grasp the idea of verbs, his speech has just not advanced to that point yet.
Maybe this is normal. I don't know. I do know that I watch other kids his age and most of them speak in sentences and listen and respond when spoken too. My kid doesn't hear you and is running off to sort the colored blocks on the other side of the room as you ask him a question. He may call out the colors of the blocks as he sorts or stacks them, but he doesn't want to talk to you about them. So please, don't ask. I know this distraction is likely normal for his age, but I feel that the lack of speech is not.
Tomorrow we will have the first of numerous evaluations. I'm terrified about what we might discover. Maybe Doodlebug is totally normal and I'm expecting too much, or maybe he does have a developmental delay or disorder. Either way, I'm looking forward to getting some answers and perspective from experts.
No matter what happens, I know he will still be my lovable little man with his squinty-eyed smile and his sweet kisses. NOTHING can ever change that. But I have to admit, I am feeling nervous and holding my breath tonight.
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Search for the Perfect Diaper Bag
No matter how hard I try to stay organized, my diaper bag always ends up a disaster in which I cannot find anything that I need when I need it. I have gone through 5 different diaper bags in 2 years. They are either too small and do not fit all my required items for Doodlebug (diapers, change of clothes, sippy cup or bottle, snacks, books or a travel toy, etc.), or they are too flimsy (and don't hold a shape) or too heavy to begin with (try carrying a 20 lb bag and a 30 lb toddler when you're 6 months pregnant!)
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| The jumbled mess that is my current diaper bag. |
I gave up on this quest as Doodlebug got older, thinking that I would be relying on a diaper bag less and less. Now that little one is on her way, I'm on the hunt again for a diaper bag that will work for our needs. I will need it to work for BOTH kiddos.
My main requirements are:
Roominess - the bag should be big enough to carry all our needed items, while still providing enough space to find things inside.
Lightweight - Nothing is worse than a diaper bag that weighs you down and adds burden. If it's already heavy when empty, it's out of the running.
Light-colored Inside - My first diaper bag was a black messenger bag that was also black inside. I couldn't ever find anything inside! A light color or pattern inside is a must to avoid the black hole of baby items.
Stylish - I'm not a slave to fashion, but I would prefer a diaper bag that is cute and appeals to my style, not frumpy!
I've narrowed down the options to these two cute tote bags:
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| Balboa Bags |
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| Ju Ju Be |
But I'm still undecided. Have you tried either of these? Have they worked for you?
Monday, January 13, 2014
Quiet Moment
Sunlight peeks through the blackout shades and casts a light glow on Doodlebug's blue room. His eyes are heavy with sleep, but he still has a strong grip on my ear. The nuk in his mouth squeaks. I know he will be asleep any moment and that I should leave him drowsy, but I cannot tear myself away from this rare, quiet moment with my son. We lay still, staring at the ceiling and breathe in rhythm, our chests rising and falling together. Doodlebug rolls toward me and softly rubs his hands on either side of my face. "Mama" he whispers before closing his eyes into sleep.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
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