My first hint that Doodlebug might be falling behind developmentally was months ago when he was still going to full-time day care. At pick-up one day, I knelt down to say hello to one of his friends (another little boy who is only one month older than Doodlebug). "Where's Doodlebug?" I asked the little boy, expecting him to point or say "there". Instead, he replied, "He's right over there." A perfectly comprehensive 4 words sentence that I couldn't imagine Doodlebug saying even months from now or even understanding.
Over the next few months, I've tried not to worry, but instead to celebrate Doodlebug for who he is with all his quirkiness. I thought staying home and having more one-on-one time with me would help him develop speech better. So even though we had some concerns at his two year Well Child appointment, we wanted to give him more time to develop. I've always heard other parents say that their child just started talking one day or that their child changed so much in just one month. So I guess I was crossing my fingers and hoping that's what would happen for Doodlebug.
November came and went and then December and the holidays, too. It seemed like Doodlebug's speech hadn't advanced at all. He has learned new some new words. My little guy knows all the letters of the alphabet, all the colors of the rainbow, numbers from 1 to 13 and even many shapes. But don't ask him to tell you what he's doing, ask for what he wants or talk about a book in even a two-word phrase. Because he won't. Even when we try to encourage him to say "want strawberries" he replies either "want" or "strawberries", or when we comment that he's "dancing to music" he replies "dance" or "music". Never both words. He has not seemed to grasp the idea of verbs, his speech has just not advanced to that point yet.
Maybe this is normal. I don't know. I do know that I watch other kids his age and most of them speak in sentences and listen and respond when spoken too. My kid doesn't hear you and is running off to sort the colored blocks on the other side of the room as you ask him a question. He may call out the colors of the blocks as he sorts or stacks them, but he doesn't want to talk to you about them. So please, don't ask. I know this distraction is likely normal for his age, but I feel that the lack of speech is not.
Tomorrow we will have the first of numerous evaluations. I'm terrified about what we might discover. Maybe Doodlebug is totally normal and I'm expecting too much, or maybe he does have a developmental delay or disorder. Either way, I'm looking forward to getting some answers and perspective from experts.
No matter what happens, I know he will still be my lovable little man with his squinty-eyed smile and his sweet kisses. NOTHING can ever change that. But I have to admit, I am feeling nervous and holding my breath tonight.
This IS normal. I have six kids (one isn't a year old yet) and every one of them learned at a different pace. My second daughter talked the latest. She didn't even babble much but focused on building. Around three, she finally started to talk - all at once but had a difficult time actually pronouncing words until about five.
ReplyDeleteMy oldest son started with objects. He didn't really talk for a while except to point to everything and state what they were. That changed when my husband had taken him out to the post office and he found the copier "very interesting" at three.
My oldest daughter talked the youngest at a year and a half and was reading at three. I have a video of her reading to my youngest daughter in her carseat/carrier.
Really, it's nothing to worry about. The interesting thing is, that if they weren't focused on talking, they were developing faster in other areas. The only thing is that if you put him in a public (or maybe private) school, they may suggest speech therapy. Don't know how much that helps as we homeschooled.
Thanks so much for your comment, Nancie - that is really reassuring. It's so hard to know what is "normal" and when to worry as a first time mama.
DeleteYou are right about development advancing in other areas, while perhaps something like talking lags behind. That's one reason why we've delayed having Doodlebug evaluated. I do think he will talk on his own time. Hopefully the therapist can give us some strategies to support him along the way.
Thanks again!